and when she speaks
Thursday, January 13, 2005
fuckin hell. tell ya, i reali bwg oredi. y? y can suay until tis kinda extend? i reali dun uds. nvm.. lemme tell yaa..
ytd, me, cin, wei, kel, gulshan, caier went to c the seed of chucky. we watching the 10pm showw. after the movie, its bout maybe 12 plus oredi. decided to go to the chocolate bar. n wei n kel went home. the rest of us, went to boat quay. n meet jinting, adam, dino n his gf dere. adam treat us, n i drank quite alot ytd.. at about 3 or 3 plus lidat... i not very stable oredi.. feel like vomitting.. n i throw up more den 3 times ytd.. my bag, not wif mi.. n den.. i dunno y, i dropped my mum's hp. i reali got no idea how i lost it. haiiiiii.. ytd lost le i still dunno. until today morning when i wake up, i wan to find my hp den realise its lost. sobss..
ytd they sent mi home, n after tt i went home after throwing up i jus fall on my bed n slp. tts y i dunno my hp lost. today i kip calling tt no. n tat bloody uncle kip hanging up my fone. until gulshan sms him n sae we will reward him den he call backk. he sae he;s not e one hu found my fone. its he;s fren. n his fren sell him 600. den his fren go batam oredi. wth lorz. bullshiet! negotiate e price wif him. i sae 450. meet at chinatown mrt, i went wif my dad n bro. but my dad hide at other corner. tat bloody uncle came out n ask mi for the money. my bro took the fone n pass mi n my dad appear. den my dad gan tt uncle until...... bwg. i c oso scared ar. they like gg to fight anytime.. den i stand behind n c... my dad sae gif him 50 bucks drink kopi la. dun sae dun haf. den he ask for 200. wtf lorz. jus take n go. or sua. den he dunwan. dumb ass. c him old ar.. or else ask my dad not to let him off.. is ke lian him.. like so old liao.. but ke lian him den hu ke lian mi ?
haiii... today noon b4 i get back my hp, i nearly breakdown. reali almost breakdown. i reali cannot take it oredi la. so many tings happen once in a shot. den my mum kip shouting at mi. she ask mi to get lost. dunwan to c my face. even sae wan to kill mi. cos tt wan is her bf buy for her wan. T.T so sad u noe, to hear those words coming out from her mouth. i haf to sae the whole ting out wad. den next, my dad;s turn. ask mi y i so late go home. y i ddrink. den sae lost hp is small case. wad if smth bad happen to u. wad u wan mi to do. n sae dun force him to restrict mi from doing many tings. wa laoo. haiss. after 1 scold den another scold. my mum den shout n sae awhile drink, awhile shk. wad happen to u. y my daughter become lidat. even i hart pain is not because of the fone. i hart pain y my daughter become like tis. hais. burst into tears after she sae tis sentence.
tot to my selff... yaa... y should i make myself so miserable? y should i kip torturing myself tis wae? drink until lidat.. so wad? he noe? even if he noe so wad ? wad can he do.... i should reali wake up oredi. no point doing all tis shits n waiting for smth impossible to happen again. now i jus wan to lead a simple life. god, pls stop playin wif mi oredi ok. i had enuff. reali haf enuff le k. if u reali wan to take away so many things from mi, den i rather........ haiz.
N thx ya'll for ytd.. esp gulshan.. thanks for taking care of mi.. n sorry for all the trouble ya..
nw nth means anything to mi... i onli haf my frens n family. nth else... another ting is.... my aunt... hais. my hart v pain. c her suffer. everydae c her hair drop. pls god, i beg u. dun let her leave mi..dun take her away from mi. i reali cannot afford to lose anyone oredi. ive lost too much too much. but by seeing her condition, i tink... she reali cannot make it oredi. im not cursing her... haiz. she left wif one month plus. i will treasure tis one month plus.. pls dun leave mi. T_T i will try my best to help u in wadever tings. if u nid mie.
lastly. i will listen to everyone's advice. i will let go. shall not hang on anymore. itz like everything changed jus in a moments time. tired of explaining the WHYS. jus let it be bah. if he's mine he will definately come back one dae. if he'z not, den, i guess its all fated. at least i still haf those memories in ma hart, like wad gwen saes. thanks alot. thanks for all the memories u gave mi.
Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours
left
HER
thoughts
10:29 AM;;
