and when she speaks
Saturday, July 22, 2006
had a chat wif mummy few daes ago. chatted about alot of things.. family.. skul work.. relationships.. money.. im actuali very tired but i hardly haf any chance to tok to her like tis. so i rather sacrifice my sleeping time. ya she's right.. loving somebody doesnt need to be tgt with them.. as long as he is happy.. if that person is happier with someone else.. den should let him go.. but of cos i am not as generous as my mum.. to let my dad go. while we're chatting, we cried tgt. seeing her cry makes my heart hurts.. but sometimes she jus dun uds me.. she jus scolded me like nobody's biz 5 mins ago.. im fucking pissed off with her. but, i cant do anything cos she's my mum. well sometimes i reali feel so unfair for her. but tis kinda things are all fated. and she suddenly asked me about terence. i dun even noe how to ans her.. and she even asked me izit tat he let me down in some wae. i covered up and said no. i jus dun wanna let her worry so much. haiz. everyone tells me their probs.. DEN WHO LISTENS TO MY PROBLEMS ? but wad to do.. they're my family.. i dun listen.. who listen... my mum.. bro.. da sao.. all throw their probs at me.. i wish i could help too.. when im doing proj tt dae, dad asked me to go to bed. even if i haven finish my work, jus go to bed. i told him i cant.. if i dun do.. means only derek will be doing. den the whole grp will die.. im reali very depressed about projects n started to cry while toking to him.i reli had enuff. everyone's true color is starting to show.. well i will not put hopes n trust in anyone again. aiya, forget it la. how can u find true frens in nafa ? everyone is jus using each other n wearing a mask everydae. jus fuck off can. dun act in front of me.. i'll see by the end of second yr how drastically my class will change. LETS SEE. every new term, new things will happen, new grps will be formed. and i actuali saw a change in smth ald.. but i dun wanna sae, so pls DUN ask. im fucking disappointed! only one person noe wads going on and how i feel.. it reali hurts. on fridae, the pain i felt is reali.... ahh it cant be described. hais. from now on, i'll jus care for myself. the rest, none of my biz ald.. wanted to go dxo but suddenly cancelled off. so i went home as i haf no where to go. dun realli feel like going home tt dae cos my mood is reali v bad.. but no choice. no one to go out wif me so i jus haf to go home. reached home for less den one hr den i went to town again. went to watch pirates of the caribbean wif roger. we waited 3 hrs for that show to start cos its all sold out. tat person oso very funny wan lo. he said theres actuali 2 more seats at the 11pm slot. but the seats are separated. -.- wtf. den still tell us for wad? brainless. when we're about to head for supper, he found out tt his car key lost. -_- so we rush back to find again. haha. lucky shit he found back. and we went to geylang to haf tau huey n you tiao. reached home at 5am. lucky mum din find out or else i sure get scolding.. ya fuck she's scolding me now. why cant she uds me abit.. scolded me for not helping her doing hsework even i got no skul. its not tt she duno i got alot of work to do. i cant take it ald la. sae its useless to haf a child like me. if im reali tt useless i wun even tink of buying her fav tidbits when i pass by. and when i tell her tis sentence, she can even sae, i dun need u to do tat! fine then.. i'll gif up everything.. my family.. my studies.. u.. in my eyes, there's only me. and let me tell u that.. i haf become like tat is all becos of u all, fucking cheebye!stop flirting with me, im giving up on u. disappointed.
left
HER
thoughts
10:34 AM;;
